Gyan , Fears , Dreams and life :)

19 Mar

You get Gyan from all sources , everyone (no matter how imperfect their lives are )has a perfect suggestion / advise for your life. and so One day I get to hear this ” Don’t be too stubborn and lose what you could have had in life “

I took me few minutes to absorb it and it was such a statement that I can interpret in many ways . we were talking about how he is getting married because he has to and in contrast how I was adamant I prefer to be single than with someone I don’t love and share a certain level of connectivity. I have nothing against the way he or any body else choose to direct their life , but in an attempt to justify our own action how fair it is to find fault with other people’s life . And everyone around advocating ” there is nothing like a fairy tale relationship”, in the end life is an adjustment .

Its been couple of weeks and I am still stuck on that line .

very next day, over a G-talk chat Minni popped a question ” whats your Worst fear?”
I smiled and instantly I knew my worst fear is to live a life others want me to live and start believing that this what I wanted from life. To some extend we do tend to get influenced by the ideas and people we come across , and if you hear something too many times it does leave a mark somewhere in the mind and your sub-conscious starts accepting it. I don’t want a tug of war between my mind and heart.

we both discussed at length how we dread being trapped in a marriage / situation where we can’t fulfill our dreams , where we are stuck in a routine.And then I talked to few other friends , they share the same fear of being stuck up with someone they don’t want to spend life with or not able to do what they dream of because they have to leave all dreams aside in the process of settling down.

Then DG asked me a question , for which I don’t have a clear answer ” what you really want in your life”.
I can write pages of things in general but what is the direction of my life is not something I am sure of .
I think we have been thinking too much about what we don’t want and not concentrating on what we want from life. Its time to know what I really want and then plan how I am going to get it .

How many of us really know what we want from life ???


9 Responses to “Gyan , Fears , Dreams and life :)”

  1. girlsguidetosurvival March 19, 2011 at 8:48 pm #

    DG knew your needs part of the equation so she asked about the wants. It amuses her how often we confuse wants with needs and needs with wants and end up concentrating on what we don’t want. The more we dread these don’t wants the more they show up in our lives πŸ™‚ .

    Wish you’ll find out sooner what you want and work hard to get it. πŸ™‚


  2. Bikram March 21, 2011 at 10:17 pm #

    I doubt if we can ever find out what we really want in life.. if we do then we will be the happiest people cause then at least we can work to attain it ..
    Human heart and mind are clever they show you what you want for that moment and the next moment things might change .. or if you attain one there is always the need to get another one …

    But then thats why we are mere mortals and not gods .. cause only a god knows what it is ..

    I beleive that if you are happy in what you do , and happy wit hthe results then thats goood .. otherwise human heart is such ki DIL HAI KI MAANTA HI NAHIN πŸ™‚

    all the best

    • sexandtheindiancities March 23, 2011 at 11:45 pm #

      yes Bikram , human heart does change and there is no end to greed and wants … but leave the materialistic things aside ..what will give you peace and sense of having what you want from life cant be everchanging, we do reach a certain point in life when we are capable of having a dialogue with ourself and figure out whats that one thing /or things that we really want from life and how much of it is realisticaly achievable πŸ™‚

  3. spike March 22, 2011 at 10:47 pm #

    its funny how as kids we know just what we want from life, but as adults, we are so confused abt it. I guess education does ruin people’s intelligence… πŸ˜‰ ↲
    If you have watched it, you’ll know why the last portion of the article reminds me of christina’s character in the movie vicky christina barcelona..

  4. The Wild Child May 3, 2011 at 9:17 am #

    If I were to be very general, I’d say I want my freedom; the right to live my life as it suits me; personal growth in terms on more learning, new opportunities and experiences; and enjoyable, interesting company along the way to share the journey. I’d like any potential lover or spouse to belong to this category….someone who can share the journey, someone who at least gives me room to be everything I can be, if not help me in some way to get closer to that, and lets me help him likewise.

    What I don’t want: someone who puts a full stop to the journey. Either by making himself the destination (“You’re married to me therefore you can’t/shouldn’t do xyz”), or by introducing other obstacles (such as saas-bahu drama).

    Thanks for raising such an important point. I hadn’t given it a thought earlier but it’s so true….don’t we always attract what we abhor?!!

  5. Writerzblock June 13, 2011 at 2:44 am #

    Thanks for that very interesting comment on my blog πŸ™‚ You hit the nail on the head with this line ‘don’t go to city xyz and expect to find city abc’ !!

    As for this post of yours, I know of people who have always known the next goal, the next step. As for me, I have always been clueless!!! Though, after reading your post, I have identified my worst fear, and now I think I also know what my ultimate goal is…

  6. Sanjana July 6, 2011 at 12:10 am #

    i met with a very good life coach, he helped me focus on what i want out of life. it was quite an interesting session (though it reduced me to a teary, snotty mess and he didn’t have tissues even!), so yes, i know what I want out of my life. :o)

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